Week 14

Hey All,

The UMFL Championship Game was a nip and tuck affair with the Little Flowers of Jesus holding an 84-83 lead over the Avalon Aces as Monday night's game between the San Francisco 49ers and the Arizona Cardinals started. The 49ers Frank Gore then exploded for 167 yards rushing, 10 receiving and a touchdown to lead the Little Flowers of Jesus to the promised land. The Little Flowers of Jesus are the UMFL champs with a 108-84 victory over the Avalon Aces. The loss rocked the commissioner who vowed that his Avalon Aces would be back next year to take care of "unfinished business." However, now is the time to salute the LFOJ and their UMFL title. Rumors are that a championship parade will be held in Walnut Creek, CA.

Folks, it was a fun season. It was great having a 16 team league and we hope it is a bigger success next year. Oh, and at this time, the rules committee is accepting suggestions as to how to improve the league for next year. Among those rules being considered is the addition of a wild card round to the playoffs. Please feel free to email the commissioner with any other suggestions.

Until next season rolls around, I hope enjoy the rest of the NFL regular season, playoffs, and Super Bowl. I also hope you all have a great holiday season.
-The Commissioner

Week 13

Hey All,

It was an exciting round of Conference Championship Games!!!!

In the Eastern Conference Championship Game, the Avalon Aces used a strong team effort to beat the Canoga Lakes Capitalists, 98-72. Only the Pittsburgh Defense failed to deliver double digits for the Aces.

In the Western Conference Championship Game, the Little Flowers of Jesus held off the Mighty Birnkrandt Moose, 74-66. Drew Brees was the man who lifted the Flowers to the title game.

So, this week is the UMFL Championship Game. The Avalon Aces will take on the Little Flowers of Jesus. Tune in next week to see who will etch their name into the record books and hoist the Melvin Bingham Trophy.

Have a great week and thanks again to everybody who played this year!
-The Commissioner

Week 12

Hey All!!!!

The regular season is now over and I, the Commissioner wishes to congratulate the four divisional champions:

Western Conference
Pacific Division: Little Flowers of Jesus
Midwest Division: Mighty Birnkrandt Moose

Eastern Conference
Southern Division: Avalon Aces
Atlantic Division: Canoga Lakes Capitalists

Wow, what a last weekend it was in the league. The craziest race had to be in the midwest division but the Mighty Birnkrandt Moose won their game and claimed the divsion title.

Meanwhile in the Atlantic division, the biggest upset in the league this season was pulled off when the Arkansas Diamondbacks knocked the Thunder Mountain Lightning out of the playoffs with a two point win.

I would like to thank everyone for playing in the league this year and hope you all keep up with this blog as the UMFL goes into playoff mode. It's been a lot of fun this year.

-The Commissioner

Week 11

Hey All,

It's coming down to the final week in all four divisional races in the UMFL. So this week's blog will be know as "The UMFL: Chase for the Playoffs Edition." Let's take a look at the playoff picture.

Western Conference
Pacific Division- This week's game between The Quite Smashing Pumpkins and The Little Flowers of Jesus will decide who makes the playoffs. Both teams are 7-3-1 and the winner here will take the division crown. Odd team out in this division are the Piranhas. The Piranhas sit at 7-4-0 with no chance to win the division. Wow, what a difference a couple of ties make in the race.

Midwest Division- The Mighty Birnkrandt Moose hold a one game lead over the Cunning Old Guys. If the Moose win this week they will take the division. If the Moose lose and the Old guys win, then the league will have to go all the way down to the fourth tie-breaker to decide the winner. That tie-breaker is total points scored during the regular season. Right now, the Old Guys have outscored the Moose, 872-868. So, to win the division, the Old Guys need to win their game, have the Moose lose their game, and then hope they hold on to their five point lead in total points scored. Whew!!!!

Eastern Conference
Southern Division- The Avalon Aces face the K. Kiwis for the division crown. The winner is in as division champs, the loser stays home.

Atlantic Division- The Thunder Mountain Lightning control their own destiny. If they win this week, they win the division. The Canoga Lakes Capitalists need to win their game this week along with a Lightning loss to claim the divsion title.

Okay folks, for this week we know there are some Thanksgiving Day games, so get your starting lineups into the commissioner by kickoff Thursday. All the byes are over in the NFL, so all players are eligible.

Have a great last week of the UMFL regular season!!!!!

-The Commissioner

Week 10

Hey All,

What a great week it was in the NFL! It was another awesome week in the UMFL too.
Let's take a look at the playoff picture in the UMFL.

Western Conference
Pacific Division: The Little Flowers of Jesus control their own destiny. If They win the last two games and they are the division champs. The same goes for The Quite Smashing Pumpkins. However, the Piranhas need help. they need two win out and hope the Pumpkins to go 1-1 and that the Flowers lose their last two games in order to win the division.

Midwest Division: This week's game between the Cunning Old Guys and the Mighty Birnkrandt Moose could decide the division. If the Old Guys win, they would claim the division title by virtue of their season sweep of the Moose. If the Moose win, then a scenario where the division crown is decided by the fourth tie-breaker could happen.

Eastern Conference
Southern Division: The Avalon Aces control their own destiny. If they win their last two games, they will win the division. The K. Kiwis need to win their last two games and have the Aces go 1-1 in their final two to win.

Atlantic Division: The Thunder Mountain Lightning controls their own destiny. If they win the last two games they win the division. The Caps need to win the last two games of the season and have the Lightning go 1-1 down the stretch in oreder to claim the crown

Okay folks, the byes in the NFL are done. There are no byes this week, but there is another Thursday night game. So please get those rosters in by Thursday night.

-Have a great week!
-The Commissioner

Week 9

Hey All,

It was another great week in the NFL!!! Carson Palmer was nails against the Baltimore Defense, the Cowboys are looking good, and The Steeler defense is still awesome!


Here's five quick notes about the UMFL...

1. Vince Young comes in at QB and suddenly Tennessee has won two in a row. I can't stand Vince Young, but the team is playing better with him at QB.

2. The Colts are just a tough, tough team. Peyton Manning is just clutch.

3. The Patriots are really starting to take off again. It could get scary.

4. This just in... the Chicago Bears stink. Boy, the Cutler trade is looking worse and worse all the time for Chicago.

5. You always remember the games played in November. The last three weeks of the UMFL regular season will be huge!!! The races are tight in all four divisions. You will all receive an e-mail outlining the league's tie-breaking procedures.

BIG NOTICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THERE IS AN NFL GAME ON THURSDAY THE 12TH!!!! ALL ROSTERS MUST BE IN FOR THIS WEEK BY THURSDAY AT 5:00 PM PST!!!!!

Byes: The Giants and the Texans are off this week. So plan your rosters accordingly.

Have a great week!!!!
-The Commissioner

Week 8

Hey All,

What a week it was in the NFL! The Cowboys are on a roll after whipping Seattle, Tennessee finally got a win, and the Rams actually got a win too. What's next, Al Davis starts adapting his team to a modern game plan?


Here's five quick notes on the UMFL...

1. Miles Austin has become the number one wideout in Dallas. Wonder what Terrell Owens thinks about that?

2. If you get a chance, check out the bootleg run that Mark Sanchez scored on against Miami. He carried out his fake so well, the Dolphins were digging at the bottom of the pile looking for a ball that wasn't there.

3. Eric Mangini's days are numbered in Cleveland. That's really a good thing for him. Would anybody really like to live in Cleveland for the longterm?

4. The 49er defense did something I hadn't seen in awhile. They sacked Peyton Manning three times and didn't allow a TD pass. The Niners have a strong upside for 2010.

5. Bret Favre is still a football god.

Bye Weeks: Buffalo, Cleveland, Oakland, St. Louis, Minnesota, and the New York Jets.
Please get your roster changes into me by Saturday night.

Note: A lot of people forgot about their defense change for the week with Pittsburgh being off. So, I gave everyone the Baltimore defense by default.

Have a great week!!!!
- The Commissioner

Week 7

Hey All,

It was a week of blowouts in the NFL. Cincinnati crushed Chicago, Indianapolis cut the horns off the Rams, and the Jets soared over the Raiders. It was a weird week in the UMFL with two ties coming into play.

Here's five quick notes on the UMFL...

1. If you're up 38-0, you should be able to eat a hot dog on the sideline. Dan Dierdorf and all the idiots who were offended by this need to grow up. I remember when QBs and Coaches used to grab a smoke on the sidelines.

2. The Bengals' Cedric Benson must have loved running all over the Bears.

3. Just when you write off Tony Romo, he has a big game. It's annoying.

4. The Steelers defense is still awesome.

5. The Rams, Buccaneers, and Browns are pathetic, but the Raiders several levels beyond pathetic.

BYE WEEK: Cincinnati, Kansas City, New England, Pittsburgh, Tampa Bay, and Washington are all off this week. So please get those adjusted starting lineups into me on time.

Have a great week!
-The Commissioner

Week 6

Hey All,

It was a fun week in the NFL!!! We saw the New York Giants get crushed in a dome and the Tennessee Titans get crushed in a freak blizzard in New England. We also saw great days from Brett Favre, DeAngelo Williams and Randy Moss. Also, just when I think the Raiders are the worst team ever, Tampa Bay and Tennesse start showing why they could go winless.

Here's five quick notes about the UMFL...

1. Mark Sanchez is definitely showing signs of looking like a rookie.

2. The Patriots are looking pretty awesome right now.

3. It looks like the Eagles thought they had last week off as well when they played the Raiders.

4. Who else is surprised that Denver is undefeated?

5. Drew Brees is still a football god. However, if he is such a god, why does only one team own any of his wide receivers?

BYE WEEK ALERT: Denver, Detroit, Tennessee, Seattle, Jacksonville, and Baltimore are off this week. Be sure to get you rosters in on time!!!!!

Have a great week
-The Commissioner

Week 5

Hey All,

What a cool week it was in the NFL! The Atlanta Falcons had an offensive explosion in San Francisco, the Browns and Bills played the ugliest game ever, and the Raiders continued to show why they may be the worst team of all time. I'm saying they may be even worse than the 1952 Dallas Texans.

Here's five quick notes about the UMFL...

1. It's good to score. 75 of the undefeated Canoga Lakes Capitalists' 121 points came from touchdowns, field goals and PATs. They even got a TD from their defense.

2. The Quite Smashing Pumpkins are feeling better off last week's one point loss with a three point win this week. They could be this season's cardiac kids.

3. The Raiders stink. No, I mean they really, really stink. If I was the 2010 number one draft pick, I would start talking to CFL teams right now.

4. The Commissioner got lucky. My third WR was put in to cover the bye week and he racked up 210 yards receiving and two touchdowns.

5. Payton Manning is still a football god.

BYE WEEK: Dallas, Indianapolis, Miami, and San Francisco are all off this week. Please adjust your rosters accordingly and have your starting lineups into me by 8:00 PDT Saturday night.

Have a great week!!!!!
-The Commissioner

Hey All,

The NFL Season is 25% complete with the New Orleans Saints and the Denver Broncos looking like the teams to beat right now, The Oakland Raiders and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers look like two of the worst teams ever, and Mark Sanchez had his first bad week as a rookie with the New York Jets. Don't feel too bad for Mark Sanchez though, remember Peyton set the NFL rookie record for interceptions in his rookie season.

Here's five quick notes about the UMFL...

1. There are two undefeated teams in the league that will be knocked down to one after the Canoga Lakes Capitalists and the Thunder Mountain Lightning face each other this week.

2. There were some very close games this week in the league. A few yards here or there have been the difference in these games.

3. The Raider offense will never do anything as long as Paul Hackett and Ted Tollner are on the coaching staff.

4. How did Tony Romo fall apart so quickly as a QB? Is he still seeing Jessica Simpson?

5. Brett Favre is still a football god.

BYE WEEK: Watch out folks, Chicago, Green Bay, New Orleans, and San Diego all have a bye this week. Please adjust your rosters accordingly and notify me of your changes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reminder: Let's get those lienups in by Saturday night at 8:00 PM PDT

Have a great week!!!
-The Commissioner

Week 2

Hey All,

Week two of the NFL season was even more exciting than week one. Mark Sanchez is quickly attaining hero staus in New York, Bret Favre is really enjoying handing the ball off to Adrian Peterson, and it's amazing what Peyton Manning can do with 15 minutes. It's also really fun to watch the Forty-Niners play tough football again.

Here's five quick notes about the UMFL...

1. It seems like Drew Brees will have one of those statisical seasons for the ages. Remember how awesome LaDanian Tomlinson was 2 seasons ago?

2. Larry Fitzgerald's whining in Arizona is not a good thing.

3. The power division in the UMFL after two weeks is the Southern Division.

4. I'm really excited over the game between the The A-Team and the Arkansas Diamondbacks this week.

5. Frank Gore of San Francisco looks to be a great pickup for any owner looking to make a move at running back.

Reminder: Send your starting lineups by 8:00 PM PDT Saturday.

Let's have a great week!!!

-The Commissioner

Week 1

Hey All,

It was pretty cool start to the NFL season last Sunday. There were a lot of great games around the league and some awesome finishes. The Bengals still must be reeling after giving up that amazing touchdown the Broncos. I also know the Raiders still choke in the clutch and that If you play for the Bills, you better live in a gated community.

As for the UMFL this week, just a couple of notes...

1. I think the Tubby Corgis achieved a rare feat by not scoring a single TD last weekend.

2. Congrats to the Little Flowers of Jesus for being the only Western Conference team to actually win a game.

3. If you had the combo of Drew Brees at QB and Adrian Peterson at TB, you cruised to victory.

4. Jeremy Shockey has become a favorite target of Drew Brees.

5. More QBs will play for the Eagles this year than the Saints, Colts, and Chargers combined.

Reminder: Send me your starting lineups for This week by 8:00 PM PDT Saturday.

Let's have a great week!!!!
-The Commissioner

The Rules

Hey All,

As a new class of greats heads into the Pro Football Hall of Fame and NFL squads are all busting their butts in training camp, It's time for us armchair GMs to get ready for the third season of the UMFL. So, without further ado..

Here are the League Rules:

1. Draft? There is no draft. Each owner will send me a roster and team name before the deadline of 9- 8-2010. Like last year, each roster will be different. If two teams have the same roster I'll ask both teams to change one player.

2. Roster: Your Roster will be as follows:
2 QBs
3 RBs
3 WR/TEs
2 K
2 Defenses (Yes, you will pick two full defenses. I.E. the Cowboys and Packers defenses.)

3. Starting Lineup: Each owner will submit a starting lineup for each game to the commissioner. Your starting lineup must consist of players from your roster and will consist of: 1 QB, 2RB, 2 WR/TE, 1 K, and 1 Defense.

4. Scoring: QB: QBs are awarded 1 point for every 20 yards gained passing and 1 point for every 10 yards gained rushing. All TDs scored by air or ground count for 6 points each. I will use common rounding off procedures in for point calculation.
ex. QB-A throws for 213 yards, runs for 26 yards and throws for 3 TDs. That day would be worth 32 points.
213 P-Yds (11 pts.)+ 26 R-Yds.= (2) pts.+ 3TDs (18 pts.)= 32 pts.
WR/TE: WR/TEs earn 1 point for every 20 yds. receiving, 1 point for every 10 yards rushing and 6 points for every TD scored. And yes, if they happen to throw the ball, they will get 1 point for every 20 yds. passing.
RB: RBs are scored the same as WR/TEs.
K: K's get 1 point for each PAT and 3 Points for each FG. Oh, and, yes if they happen to run, catch, or throw the ball, they will get credit for it like the other skill position players.
Defense: Each defensive unit earns points in this manner. Each Sack is worth 2 points. Each turnover forced is worth 3 points and each TD scored by a defender is worth 6 points.
Note: Kickoff returns and punt returns for a TD will only be counted only if the skill position player who scores the TD is in your starting lineup.

5. Bye weeks: Hopefully you will put a roster together that will take bye weeks into account. If you don't, you can use any other player to sub for the bye week affected player.

6. Roster moves: You only get three, yes just three roster moves because a player is lousy. So pick wisely. Also, any player can be subbed for who is injured or on a bye week without it counting against your three roster moves.

7. Playoff structure: That will depend on the final size of the league. If we have enough teams, I'll add a wild card round to this year's schedule. I usually like ending the league by week 14 or 15 of the regular NFL season.

8. Have fun!!!!

If there are any other questions you have, just ask.

-The Commissioner